We booked our wedding provisionally, several weeks ago – but were ‘sitting on it’ as we wanted to announce it properly, rather than just randomly let it sneak into conversation.
We threw a lovely engagement party on Easter weekend. It’s so important to us to share the loveliest parts of our journey with those who have supported us, and those who were able to join the celebrations did so with happy hearts. I mean, you could really feel the love in the room.
We held the party at Tipsy T in Nottingham, its very special to us because we began our first date there, and it’s also where I meet my lovely couples when planning their wedding stationery with them – so the staff know me really well.
It was the first chance for us to catch up with a few people we’ve not seen since before the proposal – but I had completely lost my voice!
As you can imagine, this was a bit frustrating to say the least, a chance to gossip with the girls and chat with family and friends and I could barely speak. I didn’t let it spoil the evening though, just enjoyed spending time with those who are genuinely happy for our happiness and very much looking forward to the wedding.
So there it is, November 21st 2020
the day we become husband and wife – for real. I have to keep saying it because I still can’t quite believe it.
We have sent out most of our save the dates now, a little further ahead than we needed to really as it isn’t peak season or anything but once we announced it at the party it seemed right to share it with others who we have added to the guest list too.
We have just over 18 months until our big day, it’s a bit mind boggling because we are still figuring out how to pay for what we want, but we are slowly deciding which suppliers we want for various parts of the day and in the meantime we have fun decisions to make like the little details of the ceremony, what song I want to walk down the aisle to, what we will have for our first dance, what we want the room to look like for the wedding breakfast – we have lots of ideas, we could probably have 5 different themes without thinking too hard but that is never going to look right so we are having to rein in some of our ideas (just to give you some idea, ! had about 9 different designs for our Save the dates before settling on the one that felt right… the dilemma of being a wedding stationer with access to lots of pretties!)
Our cake, which encapsulated our Batman/Wonderwoman theme, as well as the tuneless choir involvement in our proposal (and of course the song we sang shortly before he popped the question)
When deciding songs for our wedding – from very early on, when I knew he was the one – I always pictured us dancing to one particular song that had so much meaning to us, because of the lyrics. Since the engagement a lot of things have really fallen into place and much of our wedding feels it will be completely different to how I pictured it – but they are all choices that feel right, so I know they must be. This also includes the song I have chosen to walk down the aisle to – although we are not getting married in a church, I still picture myself taking those last steps before I become his wife and every time I well up.
It’s real, and it’s happening next year! Eeeek.
I’m still ploughing through gorgeous images of my wedding stationery collections at the moment, so I had better get a wriggle on, hope you have a wonderful day!
It’s wedding season and I’m seeing and hearing from a lot of couples now who are ready to deal with… ***drum roll***
***The Seating Plan***
One of the biggest stresses in planning the finer detail of your wedding can be the seating/table plan.
I advise my couples not to try and plan them out too carefully early on
it can be valuable time you might want to spend elsewhere before you have even sent out your invites… but guess what I started doing just the other day for my November 2020 wedding?
Yes, that’s right ,I began plotting out who might sit where… Oh my word…
First of all, I just want to say (easier to say than to do!) don’t panic about it.
The seating arrangements for your day don’t have to take on any formal set up – not if you don’t want them to.
I am often asked this question:
‘Who is supposed to sit on the top table’?
The truth is nowadays with changing/blended families, step parents, and far more couples who already have children getting married there is no ‘right’ way to do anything.
It’s YOURday. So enjoy it.
If you are really struggling to work out who you really want to sit with you for breaking your fast together for the first time as husband and wife (the reason it is traditionally called a Wedding Breakfast), then keep it simple.
The bride sits with her new husband to her left and her father to the right, with her new mother in law next to him. The mother of the bride then sits next to her new son in law, with his father next to her. You can then have other members of the bridal party if there is room, bridesmaids, or the best man and an usher but these are really down to personal preference.A sweetheart table, with just the two of you is a lovely modern and rather romantic way to begin your lives together.
So WHO is going to sit with WHOM?
You don’t have to mix things up – if what you really want is for everyone to relax and enjoy the day, then why not seat those who already know each other/get on well together? It might be an opportunity for them to catch up that they haven’t had for ages.
Check first with the venue the maximum number of people seated on one table. That is bound to save you a bit of a headache.
Consider the idea of a larger communal type affair with ‘legs’ of tables rather than round ones if your venue can accommodate that.
Please try not to stress over it, although I know it is easier said than done. And remember nothing is set in stone until it has gone to print!
There’s a nice easy way to plan this out, to begin with.
1. Get a pad of post-it notes, and have to hand your completed guest list, after receiving all RSVPs.
2. Using a large sheet of paper/roll of lining paper or something equally large, sketch out roughly how many tables you can fit in your reception venue, or how many the wedding coordinator has advised you will need for your numbers (This varies from venue to venue but is usually a minimum of 8 guests per table and an absolute maximum of 12, depending on the size of the room!)
3. Using each post-it, one per guest write out their names and start to place them on the tables you think they are likely to be sitting on, with the people you would like to sit them next to.
4. As you change your mind or it becomes apparent there are too many on one table, you can simply chop and change the notes around to work with what you feel will be the most comfortable on your big day. Remember that it is your day and if you would feel unhappy to have 85 year old Auntie Ethel sat next to your work friends, then move her.
The beauty of this is you can switch and swap to your hearts content without re writing or getting frustrated with your slow computer or whatever method may otherwise drive you up the wall!
Take your time with this! It is the one part of planning the day that could make or break the atmosphere, and you won’t feel relaxed if you are fretting that your distant relatives aren’t mixing with any of the other guests – nothing wrong with mixing things up a bit.
I am of course able to offer these complete with gorgeous luxurious frames and beautifully mounted and hand finished so please do get in touch if you would like to know how I can help. I actually love making these, the combinations of names fascinate me, I like to try and spot tables with the same names together as celebrity couples, always makes me smile.
My last word, for the moment…
There’s no right or wrong here. It is a good thing to get so that it ‘feels’ right, but don’t make it something to cause you upset or anxiety, it isn’t really that big a deal. As long as you are together with the people you love on your special day and you have your new husband or wife by your side, what else is there?I hope you have found this helpful, would love to read your comments below if you would like to share them.
Since my fiancé Bruce proposed a few weeks ago (I am still pinching myself, I bet you know what I mean!) I have been on a journey of discovery.
I have been working in the wedding industry for many years
but in recent weeks my eyes have opened to exactly how the wedding planning journey feels, and I thought it would be a good time to share some of that with you, with a few words of advice, so you understand that I truly know where you are coming from.
Enjoy the moment
It took me a while to get my head around the idea that we are actually planning our wedding – I dreamed about it for such a long time, and although I didn’t think it was going to happen when it did, 1 week after Valentine’s day, I was ready for Bruce to ask me to marry him so I just wanted to take a little time to absorb that he had actually done it! I still can’t quite believe it now, 5 weeks later. It was particularly memorable, you can read all about it here ‘I used to think that love was just a fairytale’.
Once it had filtered through a little, we began talking about dates and ideas. We set aside some uninterrupted time away (it happened to be Bruce’s birthday weekend) to start making plans and allow us to really think about the kind of day we want.
Here we are enjoying the sunshine and celebrating on a trip away.
I think this is the time you have to really let loose, don’t hold back, write down every idea you have had, however it sounds, whether it be larger than life, small and intimate, or crazy themed stuff… really go for it. You don’t have to entertain all these ideas, but properly explore between you what it is that you want from this one special day. I was about to say you will only do it once, but I won’t lie, this is second time around for both of us. This has only made us think even more carefully about how we want to feel on the day – we are both sure that we want to do things differently to the first time, to keep a clear picture of our wedding day and totally embrace it, together. I think that getting married when you are a bit older (we are in our early forties) and have a different outlook on life than the younger days gives you a different set of expectations. We have both grown massively in character and strength in recent years and this is going to make all the difference to the sort of day that we are planning.
Deciding the date
I have always known there would be something about our wedding date that takes us back to when we met, it was a truly magical time (another epic blog post happened just after that, I really was completely in the moment!). Without giving too much away (as we haven’t announced our date yet) it just gives a little nod towards significant dates that mean a lot to both of us. When choosing a date, we talked about any other factors that might influence it, such as dates we wanted to avoid (neither of us want to marry in the months we did before), our children’s birthdays and that sort of thing, those are all special to them and we can choose not to mix any of that up (also means more dates in the diary for celebrations in later years! We do love a party). We talked about times of the year that we either prefer or don’t like much, for whatever reason. If you are booking your wedding on a date that means something to you, as many do, take your time to get this right and once you have decided, you will know.
Reality check time. No-one has an endless pot of money, we haven’t been saving up for our wedding (because we hadn’t talked very much about doing it pre-proposal) but we do want to have the sort of day we will always remember. We have really had to think hard about what’s important to us to spend any money on that we can put towards our day, no doubt we will be working extra hard between now and the big day to get together extra pennies and avoid the stress of how much it is going to cost (life can be stressful enough, this isn’t meant to cause stress), but we are not working with an enormous budget. I have seen weddings come together for £2.5k and I have seen weddings cost over £20k. We know how much we want to spend for our day and once that’s decided it’s easier to begin looking at the sort of places that can make that achievable.
Choosing a venue
This has been the biggest surprise so far, for me.
At the point of writing this, we haven’t yet confirmed our wedding venue, it was a completely open book when we started looking. I didn’t even know where to start, even though as I said I have worked in the industry for years. I had always thought I knew the kind of wedding I would want, and where I would want it when the time came, but as we started to talk about ideas, I actually realised that it didn’t matter as much to me where we did it. I am lucky enough to be marrying the man of my dreams, that is what’s important. We have so many ideas for what we want from our wedding day, and none of it is really about the where. Our carefully chosen guests will be there to share this happy time with us, I honestly do feel like we could do that in a school hall or just about anywhere because it’s how we feel that’s important. I thought it would be about what looked best in the photos – but truthfully I know that I will be feeling so happy on the day to be realising my dreams that our choice of venue isn’t going to make it or break it. It may not be the same for everyone but that is how it has worked out for us. We have looked at a few different types of place and each one had a certain kind of feel to it, right or wrong for our day. Take note of how a place makes you feel because you will remember that when you look back on your day in years to come.
I have already designed about 9 different Save the dates for us to send out in my spare time this week, I have so many ideas about how we want to tell people about our plans. I don’t just want it to happen in a passing conversation.
As we tick each thing off our decision making list, we have made sure to pat ourselves on the back. We want to do all of this so ‘properly’, that as yet we have barely begun to share our ideas of the date or venue with our closest friends or family. When we do confirm the venue we want, we will, of course be sending out Save the Dates, as it’s a while away. I want to do little cards to ask people we want involved with the ceremony in some way, and we have an engagement party in a few weeks too. It’s so exciting!!!
I’m not saying you have to do all or any of these things, but it’s a whole brand new journey we are going on together and we are embracing it. Just because we have both married before doesn’t take anything away from what we want this time around, if anything I think it just makes us more determined to be sure we are doing it right. It’s our story, it’s our time and it will be our day – our way.
As our journey evolves I will keep you updated with the different things we have discovered along the way,
I hope you enjoy reading.
Jacqui (and Bruce, he is sure to contribute to this diary at some point soon!)
A surprise marriage proposal for your favourite wedding stationer!
A week ago today, I joined your very special club. Make yourselves comfy, I have a gorgeous tale to tell about the evening my soulmate asked me to marry him, in front of about 100 people!
I still can’t believe it happened – I know if you had one of those memorable style proposals you will know what I mean, I just didn’t see it coming.
We are members of a Tuneless choir in West Bridgford, Nottingham. Their motto is ‘Sing like no-one’s listening’.
Last Thursday, to my surprise, Bruce and I were invited up to do that in front of everyone at choir – to a song that has so much meaning to us – ‘Suddenly’ by Billy Ocean.
I had thought he was up to something for a while, but didn’t dare to dream he was planning something like this. Up we went, and began belting out this song which reduces me to tears every single time we sing it together (usually at home in front of no-one!). I had warned them it was very rare I get through it without crying.
It will never sound the same again.
I held back the tears as I stood up there with my gorgeous soulmate, totally caught up in the moment and meant every word I sang.
He seemed to be a little less vocal than usual – I was just about to find out why.
As the song ended, we drew in for a kiss and I remember thinking to myself, they don’t need to see us snogging, quick peck let’s go and sit down. Ohhh, how wrong was I.
Down he steps off the little stage, drawing a ring box out of his pocket and getting down on one knee.
Ohhh my goodness, what?! Is this real? I had to be sure.
What seemed like hours (we both said everything went into serious slow motion) later, the whole room erupted – it went totally crazy, whoops and claps and cheers – a standing ovation in fact! Is this really what he meant to do? Of course he did, he is a proper romantic. After a moment or two I realised he was still crouching.
‘Can I get back up now? I’m still down here, have you got an answer?’
My answer was yes, a million times yes.
The crowd went wild. I had waited so long to hear him ask me to marry him, and it was so loud in that room I didn’t hear a thing!
Everyone at choir was absolutely delighted having shared in our story from very early on (we have been going there together since about 2 months after we met in July 2017 – read this post to find out how our love story began) and most especially as Nadine and Bernie who are the organisers were behind him the whole time. It had begun as an idea in Bruce’s head in December, and they had been plotting it between them for a few weeks.
I’m sorry if I have spoiled the ending, but here is a lovely video on YouTube of what happened that night – you can see from my face I was not expecting it. I know I am biased but it is well worth the watch.
I look forward to sharing some of your journey as a bride-to-be. Now that I am on the other side of it, I expect I will discover things I never realised myself, and will of course share all of those with you along the way.
If you have a proposal story you would like to share, I would love to invite you to comment on the bottom of this post and tell us what happened.
I will never forget this night as long as I live, and I can’t wait for the next part of the journey.
With much love and extra sparkles
Now also a blushing bride-to-be!
PS. Go on, I know you will be wondering… Will I be making my own wedding stationery? You bet!
How do you prioritise your invites and stationery on your all-important to-do list?
Over the years I have met with a lot of brides at various stages of planning their weddings. Many of you are at the very beginning, and often ask this question.
How do you decide when to organise your wedding stationery?
The truth is that its the one element of your day that sets the scene before any other!
Although it can be difficult to decide what to do first on your list, if you haven’t arranged this before the big important stuff, how is anyone meant to know anything about your special day?
Sending Save the Dates is a good idea if you are not getting married for 1, 2 or maybe even 3 years, but if you really want things to flow from start to finish, then it helps the theme to flow if you decide on a theme from the beginning.
You might be keen to send out Save the Dates just to buy yourself some time before deciding other important details and that’s one way to begin – you could pick a neutral design that doesn’t give anything away (and won’t cause a problem if you change your mind about colours along the way, as can often happen!).
Here’s a quick guide on how to start planning your stationery:
Pick something that is in keeping with you both as a couple – not just with your theme but something that represents you. Whether it be fun, quirky, elegant, not too fussy just make it something that your guests can relate to being all about you.
Don’t cut corners! If you spend all your cash on a grand venue, stunning dress, and fancy cars leaving no money spare for your invites, sending out cheap looking or ‘fill in the blank’ cards will simply not set the scene for your guests. It doesn’t have to cost the earth but remember to leave enough in your budget.
Once you have your venue booked check with them if any daytime stationery is included if you have chosen a package. They may even be able to recommend a stationer that will work with them to make everything flow on the day.
It might be tempting to let Auntie Mabel have a go because she makes cards in her spare time, but unless you are confident that it is going to work and look good enough for your very special day, find a way to let her down gently. There’s sure to be something else she can help with if she’s creative. Home made is not the same as hand crafted!
Fancy making them yourself? It can sound like a tempting option, and you might just be able to get away with it but the most important thing here is to make sure you use a reputable supplier. There’s nothing worse than getting halfway through making invites only to find out the length of lace you bought was an end of reel and you haven’t got enough to finish the job!
Please make sure you view samples of work before you decide to book. I’ve seen some shocking samples in my time and on more than one occasion had to come to the rescue when things didn’t work out.
‘Good work ain’t cheap…. Cheap work ain’t good!’
Well that’s all from me for today, whatever you do with your planning, make sure you relax and enjoy it 🙂
A question I am always asked, but can never give a straight answer to.
Of course, I am not talking about string here.
What is the question I am asked the most at a wedding fayre?
It sounds so simple – how long does it take to make my invitations?
I honestly can not give a straightforward answer to this, do you know why?
There are sooo many factors involved, and it isn’t just about how long it takes to physically make the invitations, either (which is ALL done by me by the way).
I dedicate time to each of my couples when they book me
Every single one of my couples has a space allocated in my diary to allow enough time and care to be taken over their designs and orders.
One reason I cannot give a clear answer is because I need to know firstly when you will be looking to send your invites. Have a look at this post here to find out just how important your invites are!
There are 2 very important reasons why I need to know this: the 1st one is because as my diary books up there is not always much time to play with – and with summer being a popular time for couples getting married many want to send them around the same time! The 2nd one is because the couples who are already booked in will always take priority as they have been waiting patiently, perhaps for months sometimes for a year or more to see their beautiful invitations brought to life and as such are first in line, so to speak.
But isn’t it just printing & sticking pretty stuff on a card?
I’m tempted at this point to say ‘I wish’ but that would honestly not be the truth. I LOVE creating such miniature works of art when I get to work making invitations and other items of stationery. Even then, that is not ‘all’ that is involved. There is the time taken with couples to make sure that what they are requesting is exactly right for their big day. The time afterwards to prepare a quote and keep in contact with them about the creation of their invite sample. Not forgetting all of the other administrative work and preparation of the proofs for every single stage of the booking, this can take a couple of hours on its own sometimes. So it really is a labour of love.
Are you looking for a creation like no other, with intricate detail in the design?
I hope it goes without saying (but I will say it anyway) these designs are not quickly thrown together – so the style of design can greatly affect the amount of time needed to create it. With some of my designs less is definitely more, but with the finer handcrafted creations I have to clear my diary so I can fully focus on getting them exactly right – down to measuring each and every piece of ribbon used in the design!
I don’t work forwards from now, I work backwards!
By chatting to you in depth about your big day and getting a better idea when you need your invites ready to send, we can work out from that how long we have and where there is space in the diary to fit you in!
Don’t let this put you off asking!
I would hope that after reading this you have a clearer idea why sometimes there isn’t a straight answer to this question. There is absolutely nothing stopping you from asking me and I will give you an approximate idea based on the information discussed above, I am very approachable (I don’t bite!) and always happy to answer questions if you have any.
I would love you to ask any questions at the bottom of this post and see how we can work together on your special day.
Must go, sticking and gluing of pretty sparklies to do!
Welcome to my sparkly world of lovingly handcrafted wedding stationery goodness – oohs and aahs guaranteed!
I am the creator behind Fuchsia Fairy. It is my sparkling passion to create beautiful, timeless wedding stationery for lovely couples, just like you, who are ready to wow their guests with luxurious, hand embellished works of art.
Your stationery is so much more than paper and ink. It will take your guests on a journey with you from the very beginning,telling a story that beautifully represents your love, as you plan the most special day of your lives.
I absolutely love each and every invitation I make.because a wedding as special as yours deserves a unique, handmade creation with those extra special touches your guests will love. I am truly honoured to help you on your wedding journey, and super excited to hear from you very soon.
Lots of love, Jacqui
aka Your Wedding Stationery Pretty-fier!
Right here is where you can find all manner of poem suggestions for how to ask your guests to gift money as a preference to actual presents…here is an example
"The occasion of our marriage Is a precious time to share With family, friends & loved ones So we hope you’ll be there We do not ask you bring a gift But if you feel the need A little bit of money Would be very kind indeed. Please don’t feel obliged, though Please don’t feel you must. Just the pleasure of your company Would mean the world to us."
It’s not long now until your wedding, it’s all so exciting!
You have taken so much time making sure your wedding breakfast room looks just how you imagined it.
You have already realised those ‘finishing touches’ are really going to make the difference to your picture-perfect setting, but you need to be sure it will look right.
I have loads of hints & tips to help you on your way, but more excitingly find out here how my Beautiful Wedding Breakfast package can give your wedding breakfast room that beautifully coordinated feel you’ve been looking for.